Bluerant

Cream Cheese as Customer Service

Walking the streets of NYC again lately has invariably led me to the doors of one too many bagel places. It’s been a while since I’ve had a real choice of where to get those wonderful luscious loops of carbohydrates that are are simply impossible to find in Boulder, CO.  The increased access however has also reminded me of how the little things can make such a big difference in the perception and reputation of a business.  In this case, that little thing is cream cheese.

Whenever I order a bagel with cream cheese, I am curious to see exactly how much cream cheese is slathered on my radiant ring of guilt-ridden goodness.  You see, it’s the cream cheese that really leads to the first impression – not the bagel.  Is there so much that I can barely pull the two halves apart without it dripping all over my sleeves and lap?  Is there so little that I am forced to eat the top and bottom halves together so that I can get at least a little bit in each bite?  Why can’t anyone just use the right amount? Well, because the right amount isn’t a set amount – it depends on the person, the bagel and many other things that all effect what the customer is in the mood for.

That’s the whole point.  I don’t want anyone to assume how much cream cheese is enough, or too much.  I want to enjoy my bagel how I want to enjoy it.  I will gladly tell you how much that is if you simply ask.  If I pay you $19.95 for a bagel and lox platter and you give me one pathetic little container of cream cheese that has no hope of covering both halves of my bagel and then, even worse, attempt to charge me extra for another pathetic little container – shame on you!  You have not only lost me as a customer, but I will walk right out and tell all my friends and family – including my not too discreet grandmother who will initiate the Jewish-Grandma kvetching mill instantly.  So much for your reputation as a business.

By simply asking me how much I want, or if what I have is enough, you have instantly made me feel like you take pride in what you do and care about how I, your customer, feels about your product, service or establishment.

Whether it’s parmigiana on your pasta, curry in your Chiang Mai Noodles, or sauce on your steak au poivre, it’s what you surround your core product with that can make or break the deal.  As long as you remember that very few people like the same amount of cream cheese, it shouldn’t be hard to figure out how to make them all happy – assuming your bagel rocks.

Tags: Customer Service

The Law of Holes

The deeper you go, the darker it invariably gets…

One of the very first rules I learned way back when I was just starting in business, was, “The Law of Holes.”  I have no ideas who first coined the phrase, but it is easily one of the most useful laws I’ve encountered in both life and business.  It states very clearly:  When you find yourself in one, stop digging.

Seems simple, and it is.  Until you witness how many times it’s ignored.  This week there were two very sad instances of clear ignorance to the Law of Holes, both surprisingly brought to us from the State of Tennessee.

The first instance was from Tennessee Republican Chip Saltsman, a candidate for the Republican National Committee chairmanship.  Good ol’ Chip was wise enough in his attempts to gain favor with the RNC committee members, that he sent all committee members a CD for Christmas, entitled, We Hate the USA” — which included a song titled “Barack the Magic Negro.”

Now, I won’t even comment here on the intelligence behind actually sending out something like that — something that also contains songs such as, “Ivory and Ebony” and “The Star Spanglish Banner.”  My focus here is on how Chip – who is clearly exhibiting the type of moral and rational judgment that we would all look for in a national leader – is ignoring the Law of Holes in the aftermath.  In reply to CNN, Chip states, “I think most people recognize political satire when they see it.  I think RNC members understand that.”

I guess in Chip’s world, racial slurs and degrading cultural muses synonymous with politics.  And if the wasn’t clear from the start, by ignoring our good friend The Law of Holes, Chip has just dug himself deeper into the dark world of political suicide.  Instead of simply apologizing for his egregious lack of judgment, Chip stuck by his shovel and put some good ol’ intolerable elbow grease into his digging.  Chip, stop digging now while you can still see the sky.

Our second example of digging ignorance comes from TVA — a federal corporation and the nation’s largest public power company.  Apparently, a retention wall that held back billions of gallons of sludge, a byproduct of the ash from coal combustion from the Tennessee Valley Authority’s power plant in Kingston, about 40 miles east of Knoxville, breached sending the sludge into the nearby community.  Again, a horrible situation on its own.  TVA’s response to the situation will be critical in determining their public perception coming out the crisis.

After a similar situation eight years ago in Kentucky virtually destroyed all aquatic life in the area, when questioned about the piles of dead fish on the banks of the nearby Cinch River, a TVA spokesperson stated that the dead fish had nothing to do with the toxicity of the situation, “What happened — when you have a surge of ash, that created a wave to push the fish up and onto land,” Moulton said. “When the water receded, there were dead fish. They weren’t killed by any toxic chemicals, they were stranded by the wave.”

I am betting that TVA will keep digging here until the list of deceitful comments intended to save their reputation will actually be responsible for years of irreparable damage.

Once again, arrogance, underestimation of the general population, and a true ignorance to the Law of Holes define the path of choice for large scale public communications.

And they wonder why it gets darker and darker…

Change happens one person/musician at a time…

Just found this video through a friend of mine.

It’s a great illustration of how a common goal can get intepreted by anyone into a message of their own.  Their own language.  Their own feelings.  Their own music.

Listen to the notes of the world, and make them into your own song…

Learn more here…

Tags: change, music

Why John Stewart is clearly my idol….

Why is it that we need to rely on humor to remind us of the obvious?